Archive | March, 2013

MS-13 offers to take over LAPD

1 Mar

Los Angeles (1 March, 2013): In dramatic developments, a representative for dreaded gang MS13 offered to buy LAPD for 2 Billion dollars and change. The offer was received by LAPD chief ,who was practicing golf in private club along with his concubine.

“I just can’t believe it. We will never sell LAPD to gangsters.Hell, we are better than them”, Said the raging Chief.”We can do everything that MS13 claims to do and we do it legally.”

The reporter managed to snatch a quick preview of offer given by MS-13:

1) LAPD will give up its control of drugs, arms, prostitute smuggling business

2) LAPD will get two billion dollars and a ticket to get out of LA

3) In return,MS13 will allow LAPD officers to join the new department.

“We have extensive experience in operating extraordinarily complex businesses.L.A. is just small operation for us.Our organization works exclusively in 50 countries of world and we bring world class expertise to this city.Our reign will be beginning of new paradigm in history of L.A.” Said official MS-13 spokesman from Bolivia.”We expect to recover our investment in two years flat.We may offer IPO in year 2017 when one of us will be SEC chairman.”